The Naked Brothers Band

Ive been promising this since the beginning, and now i will write about something even worse than Hannah Montana, worse than HSM, worse than the Jonas Brothers. Not only is their music bad, but their TV show is too. I watched 5 minutes, the camera work is terrible, their music sucks and the whole premise is ridiculous. Now hold on, yes it may be marketed to 11 year olds, but it makes them think this is good music and TV. Its not. Surprisingly, this isn't a Disney creation, no, its Nickelodeon. Nickelodeon is a mere shell of its former self. I saw that station transform before my eyes into utter crap. You can argue that I'm biased towards the shows I grew up with. I don't buy that. Older Ren and Stimpy was good. All That back when it was intelligent and before they replaced all the cast with pre teens and it became so unintelligent. And Kenan and Kel. The good burger movie is a classic in my mind. Heres something i still remember from it.



Anyway, Nickelodeon is terrible now, they even tried doing a rip off of Japanese cartoons. This however, is so unbelievably bad. These kids arnt even professional actors, their mom was in some 80s sitcom and knew the right people. The acting is bad, the music is worse, the jokes are terrible and its just crappy in general. The singer is 12, the bass player is like 15 or 16. Somethings wrong here, in the show the singer is always trying to go out with her. Why even try? shes like 3 or 4 years older than you, you re not even or barely out of elementary school and shes in high school, whats up with that? Another thing, who has a Cello in a band? Also, stop trying to pass yourself off as a rock band, your not, your a pop band that was created to make money. In Live performances its obvious they don't play their own instruments. Watch this video and you'll see what i mean, look in the background, standing off to the side, are adults playing everything, they don't even try to fake playing, at least very well. The only person who seems to be actually playing is the bass player,and if she isn't, she fakes playing bass guitar really well, notice how she actually looks at the guitar neck, and finger picks the strings in rhythm with whats actually being played. Unlike the others, who strum like idiots and don't play a note.



Now, for both yours and my own amusement, I'm going to do a fake interview with the lead singer, Nat Wolff, and pretend to give him a hard time, just for laughs.


Me: So i noticed that on the today show you said that you go to an "actual real school."

Nat: Yea, we do.

Me: Well, you must because your grammar is atrocious.

Nat: well...

Me: To be honest, to me, your music sounds like a cross between Maroon 5 and a really bad Beatles rip-off.

Nat: Well, the Beatles is my favorite band. (it really is, so he says)

Me: Well I admit you've chosen a pretty good model, if you played decently and wrote decent lyrics, I mean seriously, that song you've got, "Banana Smoothie" is messed up.

Nat: Maybe

Me: Maybe yes.

Nat: Comon, don't you think Rosalina is hot?

Me: No, I thought that was just a thing in the show, maybe you should use people real names too.

Nat: sorry, but comon, don't you?

Me: Not really, and who came up with that anyway? Shes like my age and your what 12? Why try?

Nat: Umm...

Me: Well, were out of time, I'm gonna go edit this to make you look crazy, just like on every reality TV show, by the way, very insightful(snickers).

Nat: Thanks, i guess.

Me: goodbye.

So there you have it, my opinion on the Naked Brothers band. and yea, its a stupid name.

Later